I Am Running Out Of Things To Say...
And that's a good thing.
TLDR:
🐍 Parenting is complicated, anyone who tries too hard to simplify it is probably selling you psychological snake oil.
💄 I suggest my favorites right now, they are at the bottom. ⬇️
💸 Use the code MomMom for 20% off a Discovery Call and ALL ONLINE CLASSES (Like Simple Ways to Connect to Your Child or The Whining Whine Down or Weighing the Consequences: The Truth about Boundaries and Parenting)
❓My next AMA is on May 30th at 12 pm EST. Send me any question you want: parenting, child development, makeup, reality TV specific to housewives, yoga…you name it. If I cannot answer it, I will send you to the right person because I know a lot of people.
🎧 I will be recording my next mini-pod on May 9th. If you would like to listen to that, be sure to be a paid subscriber on my Substack.
🧘🏼 I hate this administration so much, the rage fills me up. But I practice tonglen as a way to combat my hopelessness. I try to alchemize my rage into something good for others. I don’t know if it will work, but it is better than stewing in my rage soup.
I find myself increasingly shrugging my shoulders and saying, “maybe.”
“My child won’t potty train and he’s moving backwards and something is definitely wrong.”
Maybe.
“My child refuses to help around the house and doesn’t care when I get upset.”
Maybe.
“My tween is glued to his games and barely talks to us; he doesn’t care about the family.”
Maybe.
“My middle schooler is so perfectionistic; I didn’t teach her that, we need to nip this in the bud.”
Maybe.
Unless life or limb is on the line, or something is so obvious it smacks you in the face, I really don’t feel sure of much anymore, especially when it comes to parenting.
What a relief.
I sometimes joke that my graduate program senior thesis topic centered on, “Solution Focused Brief Therapy.” This is how much I wanted answers and to fix and to well, literally find solutions. And don’t get me wrong, I was in a school counseling program, this theory made sense…on paper. But I liked this theory because it allowed my delusions of ease to seem real. “Three easy ways to make friends!” “Five steps to stop fighting with dad.”
Welp.
I was attracted to this theory because, primarily, I didn’t want to face the messiness in myself. I could bypass my body and my feelings, and just get down to the business of making everything okay. And because my brain moved quickly and my charm would disarm, it all worked pretty well.
Until it didn’t.
The mess that is humanity, children, and parenting doesn't lend itself to quick fixes and easy answers. And my frustration grew.
I’ve wrestled with this frustration pretty darn well, and now I'm in a place that can sometimes feel like apathy, but if I look closely, I know it can be more of an equanimity. A calmness. A knowing of not-knowing.
Is my coaching practice changing? Yes.
Will I be letting it go in the years to come?
Maybe.
I don’t care much for Mother’s Day because I find that mothers are rarely doing anything they actually want to do on that day. I mean…brunch. Really? What circle of hell is that? Dressing everyone up to eat shitty hollandaise sauce? Pass. Pass. Pass.
My experience and loose research shows that mothers want time with their friends, rest, easy time with the family, zero responsibilities, good food, rest, time for exercise, rest, time to read, rest, quiet, rest, a chill outing, and rest. And a good orgasm.
Please advocate for yourself if this day needs to look different. Your family aren’t mind-readers; you can state your needs and wants without qualification. Doesn’t mean you’ll get it all, but you won’t get anything if you don’t put it out there.
love you,
meghan
Of course, I suggest beauty as the answer to all of our woes. People who say things don’t bring happiness aren’t buying the right things.
💄 I love this Finding Ferdinand lip balm. I keep reaching for it…which says a lot.
☀️ I also keep reaching for this bronzer, and it is perfect for late spring and summer. Glowy, but not sparkly…it’s just so pretty.
💇🏻♀️ This spray has been helping my blowouts, as well as this tool (because a lady needs options).
👄 This is legitimately a great lip stain; why would anyone get the Clarins when this is available?
🧴 Finally, this set is really one of the legit spot-lighteners for your skin. You got to stick to it, but the results are real. And I love her YouTube for skincare tips.
🎵 Music? Well, of course the music is always going. I don’t care if it’s basic, I’ve been listening TTPD lately because it’s fucking good. I said what I said.
📗 Books? I’m listening to this fascinating mess. Do I think there are liberties taken? You bet. Is it good? YUP.
🩴 Clothes? I want these real, real bad. I’m old enough to remember when I used to send my birks back to the company to be re-corked. Cute, right?
🌮 Food? I made these tacos because you can use a rotisserie chicken, and none of the ingredients are bougie.
👃🏼 Scent: Love this sampler I picked up in Edinburgh last summer. I don’t have a favorite; I just close my eyes and grab one and I am happy with each one.