JUST ONE THING and my favorite books right now.

See The Good In Yourself, Parent! ♥️

What is coming up in MLPC World?

• Get ready for the Valentine’s Day Challenge in February. Become a paid subscriber to get all of the extra treats!

• Feeling squirrelly in your parenting life after the holiday break? Need a reset in your parenting life? These classes could be just the thing: Simple Ways to Connect or The Whining Wind Down (Don’t forget! If you are a paid Substack subscriber, you get 15% off all of my online classes!)

• I have some openings in my schedule for coaching clients. Click here to chat with me and see if we are a fit!

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What books am I loving right now (in no particular order)! If you’d like to skip to the JUST ONE THING, scroll down! ⬇️

• The Searcher by Tana French

• In Her Boots by KJ Dell-Antonia

• Same as it Ever Was by Claire Lombardo

• I'm Mostly Here to Enjoy Myself: One Woman's Pursuit of Pleasure in Paris

  Glynnis MacNicol

You will notice that the books are mostly fun and light-hearted. That’s on purpose. The world is frightening enough; I don’t need to jump-scare my nervous system every time I get into bed.

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Just One Thing - Parenting Style

If it is one thing I know from my 14 years of parent coaching, it is that parents are very, very hard on themselves.

Parents who care and desperately love their children call me, and they struggle to see anything good in themselves.

And I don’t blame them!

As Rick Hanson says in “Just One Thing:” what fires together, wires together, and we know a couple of important details about the brain.

1. The brain is trained to notice and hold onto the negative and dangerous. This noticing is supposed to save our lives, and it was (and is) important part of making sure humans kept propagating the species.

2. We can re-train the brain to notice good things. We used to believe literally stopped changing around five years old…now we know that no. The brain changes right until we die! We can notice our parenting wins.

3. Yes, trauma changes the brain…as the saying goes, “the issues are in our tissues;” and we do react to unconscious triggers. And no one triggers us more than our children. NO ONE.

If you don’t see the good in yourself, you’re not crazy. It is hard.

And it is doable. Even after a million missteps and mistakes. Even during despair and self-doubt.

How do you see the good in yourself, right now?

• Phone a friend. Say, “This may sound silly, but I am forgetting why people like me…what are my good qualities?”

• Ask the same friend, “What are my good parenting qualities?” Yes, this is vulnerable, but you will be blown away by what people say. Caveat: call the right people. Your extra-critical mother? Your sarcastic and bitter frenemy? Meh, skip them.

• While you are waiting in a carpool line/sitting at a sports event, taking a coffee break at work, open your Notes App and make a little list: “Qualities about me that do not suck,” and just write. You make a good stew? Put it down. You’re excellent at resting? Write it. You find excellent recipes? You got it. You own a cool biz? Yup. Keep adding as things occur to you, no matter how small or big.

• Then, end the night by writing or saying aloud: Here’s what I did well today in my parenting life! Didn’t yell when they were whining? Yup. Kept a hard boundary around technology with your tween? Yes! Celebrated a small win with a kiddo? Yup. Put one, two, or three meals on the table? WIN. Please, write them or text them to someone. Make them real.

If you are thinking, “Meghan, I cannot do any of this?” you may need more support. I offer a type of accountability for seeing the good in yourself because, yes, you may need some homework! Not sure if you need/want to work with a parent coach, click here to set up a time to chat with me.

If you are finding these posts are helpful, send it to a friend. Let’s share the love.

What does this look like for my clients?